Thursday, June 7, 2012

Conversations with Co-Workers

Seems like I've been having a lot of strange conversations with co-workers lately.  I take it as a good sign - I try not to let too much of my weirdness show around people with whom I'm not particularly close.

Since I've been a casualty of my own clumsiness and not driving (but that's another post), the Office Mama's been driving me in this week.  We've talked about:
  •  high end sex toy shops (I love Tulip in Chicago)
  • vaj-dazzlers.  According to RK, it's apparently "a thing" now to decorate your lady bits with body sequins.  Luckily, he and most of the others who commented find it absurd (I prefer a more understated and elegant aesthetic.  If less is more, then none is most.).  

Some of the stranger conversations in the office with Mr Coffee and JB have included:
  • the vaj-dazzler (it's just too funny to not make fun of!)
  • mispronounced words, like "ax a qwershchun", "kerger" (cougar), and windoos (windows)
  • the Boondocks and its social commentary
  • in depth discussions of race relations
  • political history
  • why Texas is so f-ed up
  • current politics
  • the War on Women (and my comment to Mr Coffee that the last time I checked, there were no politicians in my hooha)
  • religion (and how I dodged a bullet when asked "And where do you attend services?"  You'd be so proud of me!  I didn't say "I left the church for a myriad of political and personal reasons, namely the constant spewing of hate from people who claim to follow the teachings of a man who preached love."  Instead, I deflected with "My family attends XYZ now."
  • body art, and my collection of it and burning desire for more (no, I've not dropped my pants at the office to show some of it off)
  • my father (who worked here before I started)
  • the complexities of my strange and twisting family tree
  • sex ("People like to mate." - JB)
  • coffee accoutrements and the virtues of French Press
  • gossiping about a certain Tea Party member here
  • who's going to babysit for me once Mini-Leah or Mini-Ed is created
  • more sex
  • and other "taboo" topics that I can't really recall right now
I've also pointed out some unfortunate stains to Mr Coffee, warned him to XYZ, and sewn a button back on his shirt (while he was wearing it).  

Some days, I'm convinced we're all going to hell.  At least I'll be there with some good friends.

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